Sunday, September 26, 2010

Inspire a girl, change her world: It only take a minute

It sounds so easy, but how many times have you stopped what you are doing and told your daughter or son how proud you are of them?  Have you told them although they may be struggling in school, you have faith they will and can do better?  Have you told them you believe in them?


Did you know that a one-minute compliment can change a young person’s life forever?


Whether you are 4 or 14 or 24 or 40 years old, everyone wants to be inspired, everyone needs to hear nice things about them.  Going through the tween and teen years can definitely be the most difficult and absolutely needs to be the time you are there for them – encouraging them every step of the way.

Many kids (tweens and teens) will make mistakes, we all have.  Even as parents, we are constantly making mistakes.  The lesson is how do we learn from them?

Dove Movement for Self-Esteem Campaign is about inspiring a girl, helping to change her world in a positive way.

The Dove Movement for Self-Esteem is being sponsored by the Boys and Girls Club, Girls Inc. and Girls Scouts, Dove is marching out a campaign to help teen girls have a brighter future and step into their own skin by believing in themselves.

Read more and watch video.

Friday, September 24, 2010

DEFIANT TEENS - Help My Teen!

Let’s face it – parenting teens today can be challenging.  Whether it is the accessibility of drugs or the blatant disrespect many teens have for authority, parents are reaching their wit’s end when it comes to their teenagers.

An out-of-control teen can upset the entire family. Is that fair to the sibling?  Is it fair to the parents?  As many families are struggling with today’s economy, possible job loss and even losing their homes, the stress of parenting can be overwhelming.

Many teens believe it is normal to smoke pot on a daily basis.  Some parents even go as far as to say, well they did it in their teen and college years - but do you know what marijuana is laced with today?  Why are more kids becoming addicted to this?

In many situations seeking outside help is the only answer.  After you have exhausted all your local resources, even tried sending your teen to a relatives to live – and some may have even tried a scared straight program only to find it is very short term results – if any.

Now you are faced with the daunting experience of surfing the Internet to find help.  Doing your research is a priority.  Learn from my experiences – www.aparentstruestory.com and visit www.helpyourteens.com for valuable information to help you sift through the many toll free numbers, marketing arms and in some cases, scams when it comes to this confusing – “teen help industry.”

Monday, September 20, 2010

The Milk Party: Making children a priority

The Children's Movement of Florida was formed to take action and improve Florida's sorry report card for caring for our youth.

Their mission statement:


The Children’s Movement of Florida believes that the well-being and education of our children in Florida must be the highest priority of government, business, non-profit institutions and families. The economic future of our state and the stability of the communities we live in depend on achieving this goal. The major objective of the citizen-led, non-partisan Children’s Movement of Florida is to inform the political, business and civic leaders, and the parents and people of this state, about this issue – and encourage them to make the well-being and education of our children our highest priority, including in the way we invest our public resources.
Why now or should we say, what took so long?

Scott Maxwell of the Orlando Sentinel recently wrote:

The statistics about how we treat our children in this state should make you sick.
We have one of the highest child-abuse rates in the country. We have more uninsured children than 48 other states. Our graduation rates lag.

Yes, he is right and it is time to get involved, and get our politicians to "be" involved.  More needs to be done, we don't need a repeat of last year with the near death of two of our Florida students, Michael Brewer and Josie Ratley.

The Children’s Movement of Florida is spearheading the newest political movement making waves in the United States, calling themselves, endearingly “The Milk Party.” With events across the state of Florida, this movement comes at a time that hopefully people and politicians are listening. Currently, the group is in the middle of a 17 stop tour across the state of Florida during the month of September, called “The Children’s Express.” Click here to see if they will be in a city near you.

The latest events of James Jones, the father that defended his 13 year-old daughter who suffers with cerebral palsy, was maliciously taunted, teased and bullied on the school bus, has shed more light on this growing problem of bullying.

Learn more by visiting www.childrensmovementflorida.org and find out how you can help today.

Watch video.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Being Gay and Being a Parent of a Teenager

Recently I spoke with a mother that is struggling with her daughter that is openly gay.  This daughter is in her 20′s and the parents are still having difficulties accepting this.  Looking for blame, searching for reasons and most of all, hoping “this will pass”.  I will not pass judgment on any parent or anyone, I am a firm believer until you walk in my shoes, you truly don’t know how you would feel.  I would like to believe I would be accepting of homosexuality in my kids, and I believe I would be, as I am very open and Liberal minded, but again, I have never been faced with it.  Yes, I have relatives that are openly gay, and I am more than fine with it.   I have many friends that are gay, and actually they are the most generous and wonderful, caring people.  I don’t want to talk about them like they are a species, they aren’t.  They are just like you and me, and every other human.  They have feelings, they have emotions and they have their beliefs.  We all have ideas of what makes us as an individual happy, but it is not what makes others happy.  Diversity and  tolerance makes the world go round.

Connect with Kids recently published an article on teen kids with gay parents.  Is it a struggling? If so, for who?  The kids, the parents or society?

Source: Connect with Kids

Teen Children of Gay Parents

“A lot of teenagers will use (the word) ‘gay’ to mean ‘stupid’ or ‘dumb’… which is not true.”
– Jordan, 14, whose mother is a lesbian

Yes, the kids are alright. New research on the behavior of children of gay parents, published in the journal Family Process, reveals that the kids are not only psychologically healthy, but often appear to exhibit a lower incidence of social problems than their peers. What — and when – gay parents tell children can make a difference on how those kids handle their non-traditional family situation.
When Jordan was nine, his mom broke the news.
“Up to that point, I had not expressed to him that I was a lesbian,” says Lisa, his mom.
Jordan says initially he didn’t think much of it, but now that he’s older…
“I’m afraid a lot of people are going to be looking at my mom and others and thinking that ‘they’re not right,’ and that’s not true,” says Jordan.
Experts say adolescence for a child of a gay parent can be especially tough.
“You have a dual adjustment situation where a child is struggling to adjust to their own sexuality and to come to more adult terms about their parents sexuality, and on top of that, they’re trying to adjust to their peer group,” says Dr. Cathy Blusiewicz, an adolescent psychologist.

And what peers think and say can mean everything to a teenager.

“One difficulty of adolescence is that real desire to fit in and to be like everybody else,” says Dr. Blusiewicz.
Experts say support groups for children of gay parents can help your child meet other kids in the same situation.

“It’s comforting not to feel like you’re the only one,” says Dr. Blusiewicz.

And by talking openly about sexuality early on, at age-appropriate levels, experts say both straight and gay parents can help their child grow up to be more accepting adolescents.

“From a very young age, I have raised him to be open to difference,” says Mrs. Prince, “to stand up for who he is on any level, whether it’s about his family, or any other issue that he feels strongly about.

Jordan’s friends know his mom is a lesbian and think it’s no big deal. But to those who do, he says…
“I’m not really concerned about that. I don’t have to take the insults in. I don’t have to take weird looks and stuff like that.”

What We Need To Know

Teaching a child the dangers of harassment and/or bullying behavior based upon sexual preference can be a very difficult process for some parents. As with other discussions, there are a number of things that parents can do to make the discussion a little easier and more effective.
  • Parents need to inform themselves before they talk with their kids. Parents need to get the facts about homosexuality and need to be prepared to share the facts their kids in an age-appropriate manner.
  • Parents need to come to grips with their own feelings regarding gays, lesbians and bisexuals, and to share those values with their children in the context of the discussion. For many parents, this is the most difficult aspect of the conversation, and there are no easy answers to the problem.
  • Parents need to maintain a calm and non-critical atmosphere for the discussion. Try to use words that are comfortable and familiar when talking to kids about important topics. Parents should also try to encourage the child to talk and ask questions. They need to know that they can talk about things with the parents freely and without fear of consequence.
  • It is important for parents to search for a support group of other parents who share their same concerns and are facing the same issues. If one is not available in your area, organize one. The sharing of ideas and fears can help alleviate anxiety and give parents ideas and thoughts they may not have realized otherwise.

Resources

Monday, September 13, 2010

Teen Help Programs - Defiant Teens

Let’s face it – parenting teens today can be challenging.  Whether it is the accessibility of drugs or the blatant disrespect many teens have for authority, parents are reaching their wit’s end when it comes to their teenagers.

An out-of-control teen can upset the entire family. Is that fair to the sibling?  Is it fair to the parents?  As many families are struggling with today’s economy, possible job loss and even losing their homes, the stress of parenting can be overwhelming.

In many situations seeking outside help is the only answer.  After you have exhausted all your local resources, even tried sending your teen to a relatives to live – and some may have even tried a scared straight program only to find it is very short term results – if any.

Now you are faced with the daunting experience of surfing the Internet to find help.  Doing your research is a priority.  Learn from my experiences – www.aparentstruestory.com and visit www.helpyourteens.com for valuable information to help you sift through the many toll free numbers, marketing arms and in some cases, scams when it comes to this confusing – “teen help industry.”

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Scholarships, Scholarships and More Scholarships

With today's economic times, financing your teen's education is becoming more difficult.  As many teenagers are entering their senior year of high school, many more are busy filling out college applications.  Some are being stung by sticker shock: Just when you have digested the tuition, you realize you have dorm, food, books and more to pay for.

Now is the time to start applying for scholarships.  Even if you are not that 4.0 student, or are not gifted with a strong athletic ability, there are literally many scholarships for a variety of different interests, themes, personalities and more.

Service clubs, companies, and charities give out about $2 billion in private scholarships each year. Roughly 1 million students receive these monies—meaning 1 out of 13 students wins a scholarship. The average of these scholarships is $2,000.

Visit FastWeb.com and you will find some of the strangest and wackiest scholarships out there.  Whether it is for $500.00 or $5000.00, every little bit helps.  They also list academic and athletic monies that are available.  It just takes your time and creativity to apply.

Here is an example of what is available:

For Vegetarians Only:
Calling all veggie-lovers around the world! Two health-conscious winners will be awarded $5,000 in scholarship money from the Vegetarian Resource Group. But be forewarned: unless you love your legumes, this scholarship is not for you. Eligible applicants must not only exemplify a healthy lifestyle, but also promote vegetarianism within their community too. For more information visit: vrg.org.

For Tall People:
You’ve got Michael Jordan’s stature but you’re about as agile as a water buffalo. That’s okay with Tall Clubs International! Males over 6’2” and females above 5’8” are encouraged to apply. The reward is no small (pun intended) amount either; Tall.org awards a whopping $1,000 scholarship to the winner. Find more info at: www.tall.org.

For Plus Sizes:
Say goodbye to the cabbage soup, grapefruit only, or south beach diets! The National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance encourages “fat” people to apply for one of their two merit-based scholarships. The scholarships, offered to already-existing NAAFA members, awards $1,000 for first place, while the second place prize is $500. For more fat-friendly information regarding the scholarships, go to: naafa.org/newevents/scholarship.html

For The Next Generation of Klingons:
Trekkies, leave your capes, figurines, posters and other memorabilia behind. Just bring, well, yourself! Klingon Language Institute, Iin an effort to promote language study, awards one lucky winner a $500 Kor Memorial Scholarship—but don’t worry, fluency in Klingon is not a requirement. Check out the requirements for this scholarship at: kli.org/scholarship/.

There are many more. Learn more, click here.

Source: FastWeb

Read more.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Boot Camps Are Not The Answer

After talking with parents of at-risk teens for over a decade, one common thread is always prevalent - the immediate response from most parent is their teens needs a boot camp!

From here I have to start explaining that boot camps are punitive and many are primitive.  Chances are very good your teen will come out with a higher sense of resentment - and it will be targeted at the person that sent them there - you - the parent!

If you think you are teaching your teen a lesson - think twice.  Even if the do come out and seem a bit more reserved and even controllable - it is usually very short lived. 

Boot camps are not about building your child up to make better choices - they are about beating your child down.  In many cases, your kids are always beaten down, suffering with little to no self worth that is creating a negative environment and behavior. 

Finding a resource that will build your child back up to make better choices should be your goal.  At the time you believe you want them to be punished for their less than acceptable behavior, but in reality it is time to get to the root of the problem and start working through the issues to help them feel good again.  You remember, that toddler that made you smile - the elementary school child that brought home the artwork you have stored away somewhere.  We want our precious baby back.

If you need help in finding positive, nurturing and quality help, contact www.helpyourteens.com

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Teens and Hearing Loss

The study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association reports that almost 20% of teens between the ages of 12 and 19 have some form of hearing loss – a 30% jump from the late '80s and '90s.

Researchers have found that exposure to loud sounds can lead to noise-induced hearing loss (NIHL). Researchers tested the hearing of over 5,000 children ages 6 to 19 years and found that 12.5 percent of the children had evidence of a NIHL. Using their data, the researchers estimated that approximately 5.2 million children in the United States have a NIHL in one or both ears, and boys appear to be affected more often than girls.

Do teens take their hearing and sight for granted?  There are many children that are either born deaf or blind due to circumstances beyond their control, no longer can see or considered legally blind, or are deaf.  These children and adults face many hurdles in life, however they soon realize they have many opportunities they didn't see before.

Located in St. Augustine, Florida School for The Deaf and The Blind is one of the largest schools of its' kind. The school is comprised of two departments: the Department for the Deaf and the Department for the Blind and Career Education Transition.

Parent Sign Languages classes begin September 9th.  For more information, or to register for this class, please contact: Kim Satterfield, FSDB Parent Liaison, Voice: (904) 827-2988, Videophone (904) 201-4527, or e-mail satterfielk@fsdb.k12.fl.us.

Sources: New York Times, Connect with Kids, Florida School for The Deaf and The Blind

Read more.