Sunday, July 25, 2010

Sue Scheff: Good Parents with Bad Kids - Who's to Blame?

The recent New York Times article, Accepting That Good Parents May Plant Bad Seeds by Dr. Richard A. Friedman,  has started a lot of great conversations. (Watch video).

Fact is there are many great parents and they are doing a great job at raising their kids, but every so often you will hit that pothole in the road.  Parenting today is extremely challenging.  It is not only discussing the birds and bees that is critical, talking to your kids about the dangers of online scams, predators not to mention the prevalence of stranger danger today.

Yes, this generation is completely different.  We have gone from Mad Men to Middle to Modern Family and somehow all these shows can mirror one time of our life or another.

Good kids do make bad choices.  That is called life experiences, but if these experiences escalate to a point that is endangering the teen or the family, it may be time for outside help.  Many times the parent can be in such denial that they continue to make excuses for the negative behavior.  That can only prolong getting your child the right help.

Bad behavior by your child doesn't necessarily mean you are a bad parent.  Maybe your teen/child has been bullied, maybe they are being pressured by their peers, maybe they have feelings of sadness - there are many emotions, especially in adolescence, they could be going through that is causing the negative behavior.  It isn't always the parents fault.

It is, however, the parents responsibility to get their child help.  Don't sit around in the blame game circle, be proactive!  By trying to determine if it because dad doesn't spend enough time at home, or mom isn't home to cook dinner every night - stop all that thinking and just be concerned about helping your teen - not finding the blame.

If you are struggling with an at-risk teen visit

Make parenting your priority!

Be an educated parent, you will have safer and healthier teens.

Read more.

1 comment:

Timothy said...

Excellent article, there are so many potholes to raising children, useful parenting advice can help steer families from these unwanted dangers..