Teens and Cell Phones: Setting Up Boundaries and Rules

Cell-ear fusion: every parent’s worst nightmare!

The question is no longer whether you are going to give your teenager his own cell phone but at what age you allow him to have his own cell phone. This is largely going to depend upon you and the maturity level of your teenager (which is something that only you as a parent can gauge).

Whatever age you decide your teenager is ready, though, it’s good to have some rules in place.

In spite of what your teenager might tell you, unfettered cell phone use is not in his best interests right now.

Monitoring Software
It’s a good idea to install some mobile monitoring software on your teenager’s cell phone. This way, if you need to, you will be able to look up his call history, see what websites he has visited, and, most importantly, where his phone is located.
Do not, as tempting as it may be, sneak this software on to your teenager’s phone. Explain that you don’t want to have to use it but that it will be installed as a “just in case” precautionary measure.

Setting Limits
Set up limits on minutes and texts before you give your teenager his phone. Explain that every minute and every text costs money (even if you have an unlimited plan) and that the phone is not meant to replace the other methods of communication he already has at his disposal (house phone, email, Facebook, etc).

Decide upon a “phone curfew” (the time he has to turn off his cell phone each night). Make rules about whether or not you’ll allow the phone to be used in the car, at the dinner table, during family events, etc.

Sexting and Bullying
It’s okay to be freaked out by having to spell this out for your teenager, but you still need to do it. Sexting and sending provocative images between phones is a crime and one that he can be punished for, possibly for the rest of his life. Talk to him about this and explain why he needs to not give in to peer pressure when it comes to things like sexting, forwarding photos, etc.
Bullying via cell phone is certainly a first-world problem, but it is, nonetheless, a problem. Make sure your teenager knows how to handle any cell phone based bullying he might receive and that there will be severe consequences if he uses his phone to bully someone else.

With any luck this will be the weirdest photo your teen has.

Keep Private Information Private
Set up rules about the people to whom he is allowed to give his cell phone number (hint: only people he already knows in person. Period.). Talk about how easy it is for someone he doesn’t know to get a hold of his private information if he isn’t careful about protecting it on his phone.
You’ve had a similar talk already when you allowed him to start up his Facebook page. Talk about how the same sorts of rules apply to phones, too.

Overages
Have a plan in place for what will happen if your teenager goes over his minute and text quota. Will you have him pay you for it out of his allowance or money he earns at an after-school job? Will you have him work it off with chores around the house?
Quotas are more likely to be respected if there are consequences for surpassing them. Talk to your teenager about what is a fair punishment, but make sure this talk happens ahead of time so that he knows in advance that there will be consequences for breaking the rules.

The more open you are with the communication, the less you are going to have to worry that your teenager is going to do something life-alteringly stupid…because, obviously there will be at least a few dumb things done with that phone—that’s just how teenagers roll. If you keep the lines of communication open, though, you should be able to build a level of trust that allows you to sleep soundly at night…as soundly as the parent of a teenager can sleep, anyway.

Good luck!

Contributor:  Erin Steiner is a full-time freelance writer who covers a variety of topics for a wide range of websites including, but not limited to, Reputation.com.

Texting vs Talking: Will Your Teen Be Able to Interview?

Texting is how the majority of teens communicate.

But how will they survive in a college interview?

In a face to face job interview?

Some universities no longer include public speaking on their list of required core courses, but the current rate of teen texting may require further training in face-to-face communication skills.

According to a 2011 survey conducted by the Pew Research Center on teens, smartphones and texting, 77% of 12 to 17-year-olds have a cell phone, with 23% of them owning a smartphone. The bulk of ownership was concentrated among the older crowd (14-17 years old), and the choice of communication for all age groups was texting.

Only 39% of teens surveyed say they actually use their cell phone to make phone calls. Even more disturbing, only 35% say they speak to their friends face to face outside of school. While we know that kids haven’t stopped communicating with one another (75% of all teens who own a cell phone text on a regular basis), texting as a primary form of communication may be a cause for concern.)

Besides the safety issues related to texting while driving (26% of teens say they text while driving), texting as a means of communication can also spell trouble for basic speaking skills. Inherently, texting was meant to be a short, quick way to send information to someone.

For example, the location, date and time of a meeting or the phone number of a client, but when the younger crowd gained possession of cell phones, texting became a replacement for the good old-fashioned phone call.

There are some benefits of having a conversation via text; you can think about what you want to say before texting, and you can send information to multiple friends at once. However, there are negative things about texting, too. For example, if your conversation is extensive, it will take longer through texting than through a phone call.

Also, texting over your limit can cost you hundreds of dollars in extra charges. But the main problem with teens choosing texting as their primary form of communication is the lack in proper grammar, spelling and word usage.

Not that language use among average American teens has ever been at proficient levels, but the current use of texting certainly can’t be helping the situation. Most teenagers have always been a little shaky when it comes to proper salutations and professional face-to-face dialogue, but texting is the metaphorical end of the rope when it comes to spelling and choice of words.

In fact, if we could get a manuscript of an average teen’s text conversation, it would more than likely mostly contain the abbreviation LOL and the words OK, cool and like…and not much else. In addition to spelling and grammar issues, texting could also be weakening the average person’s ability to “think fast,” because it allows you to respond slowly.

It’s not that today’s teens are less intelligent than those who came before them, but they certainly aren’t practicing their language skills on a regular basis. If America is to become a more adept society, parents must start teaching the importance of proper verbal and written communication. After all, you can’t conduct a job interview or present a business proposal via text. We owe it to our children to demand a little less texting and a lot more talking.

This is a guest post by education writer Barbara Jolie. Barbara is passionate about education and studying online. When not writing and thinking about all things education, Barbara is busy planning her next vacation and caring for her pet cat and bird. You can reach her at barbara.jolie876@gmail.com.

Is your teen addicted to their Blackberry? Have they became Crackberry?

Your teen demands a Blackberry.
You become a Crackberry!
Now what?


The nickname ‘Crackberry’ was applied to Blackberry cell phones early on in its use, and it stuck. There is even a website called crackberry.com that claims to be the number one site for Blackberry users and abusers. Obviously, there is a reason behind the name and the comparison of the phone to the addictive substance, crack cocaine.

1. Geek disease  - Every geek had to have one as soon as they came on the market. The large screen, lots of little buttons and multi-functioning capabilities had them foaming at the mouth.
2. Addictive – Of course, the main reason for the name was related to its apparent addictive qualities. Once a person owned a Blackberry, you never saw them without it. They not only carried it with them everywhere, but they seldom put it down or took their eyes off it.
3. Compulsive – The instant communication capabilities of the Blackberry when it first arrived on the scene were novel to the cell phone user. The ability to receive and respond to your emails on your phone was quite an amazing feature, but it also meant that you were being bombarded with the sense that you needed to respond immediately to each new email that came in.
4. Expensive – As with cocaine, the ‘crackberries’ were also a very expensive habit to maintain. They cost hundreds of dollars for the unit itself and then there were the monthly data plans to carry all the functionality to the phone, besides.
5. Peer pressure - “You have to get one!” with the Blackberry seemed to be as affective with the geek crowd as the “You have to try this!” with the crowd that was into drugs. Peer pressure isn’t the least bit limited to one social group or the other.
6. Zoning – You’ve seen ‘the zone’, haven’t you? Their eyes are fixed, and they seem to be oblivious to everything and everyone else around them? The only difference with the Blackberry addict is that his eyes are fixed on an electronic device.
7. Withdrawal – A Crackberry user will suffer withdrawal if he is forced to do without his phone for more than a few hours at a time. Symptoms of the with include nervousness, irritability and a lack of focus.
8. Euphoria – If you watched a new Blackberry user immediately after receiving their first Blackberry, you would witness an obvious sense of euphoria flooding their face.
9. Behavior modification – The possession of the Blackberry created a definite change in behavioral patterns of the owner. They became much less verbal in their communication and began to prefer to use their thumbs for sending short email messages via their phones.
10. Cracked screens – There is one additional reason for the ‘crackberry’ nickname that came from a very different direction, that being the frequency of cracked LCD screens on Blackberries. Blackberries have not fared well when dropped on concrete or sent flying off the top of a car after being left their by their owner. Cracked screens, of course, often lead to the symptoms of withdrawal, listed above.

As you can see, there are a lot of reasons the Blackberries gained their nickname of Crackberries. It appears to be quite fitting.

Source:  Home Phone Service

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Is Your Teen Ready for a Cell Phone?

Parents will tend to disagree on the issue of whether or not teens should have their own cellphones or not. When you look around yourself at a mall, it would appear that the parents who have said no to cellphones are in the minority. What are the reasons some parents are withholding this privilege from their teens?

10 Reasons to consider not giving your teen a cell phone:

1. Cost of service – Cellphone service cost money. Unless a teen is paying for these costs themselves, this is just another expense that a parent has to pay for. Unless they have an unlimited plan, there can also be potential charges for overages on minutes or text messages.
2. Lost phones – Teenagers are notorious for losing things. They lose their jackets, their ipods, their school books and any number of other things. They even lose their precious cellphones. Even if you have insurance, a replacement still can cost money. If you don’t have insurance, it will definitely cost you money to replace.
3. Wasted time – Even when they aren’t actually texting or talking on their phone, it can still be a temptation for wasting time. Even the simplest cellphones seem to come with games to play and a camera.
4. Down time – Kids are connected to electronic gadgetry for much of their leisure and school time. Adding a cellphone to the mix will just make it worse. Kids need some time away from their electronic world to remind them what the rest of life is all about.
5. Distraction – Cellphones can be a distraction for kids, even if it is just waiting for a call or message. They can also be distracting to others around them while the teen themselves are totally oblivious to the annoyance they are causing.
6. Responsibility – Many teens just aren’t responsible enough to take proper care of a cellphone and use it wisely. Cellphones have been sent through the laundry and used for prank phone calls, each of which demonstrates a lack of personal responsibility.
7. Parental control – It can make it more difficult for a parent to monitor a child’s interaction with their peers, when they own their own cellphone. When they have to use the land line or their parents phone, it is more obvious to the parent to know how much time their kids are spending on the phone.
8. Late nights – Unless the phone is taken away at night, teens have a tendency to stay up to all hours texting on their phone, even on school nights. Lack of sleep is a much bigger problem in schools than a lot of people realize.
9. Unexpected charges – Teens often don’t realize the danger of giving out their cellphone number online. ‘Free’ ringtones are frequent lure to get people to give out their cellphone numbers and get signed up for a monthly ringtone fee without them realizing that they have done so.
10. Driving – If the teen is also old enough to drive, a cellphone can be an added temptation to take their eyes off the road. It can be difficult for a teen to have the self-discipline to let their cellphone go unanswered while they’re driving.

Although there are reasons why a teen should not own a cellphone, the reality is that many of them do. When that is the case, it becomes the parents responsibility to teach them how to use it responsibly and to set the necessary limits.

Also read the counter-argument – Why teens should get cell phones.

Source:  Phone Service

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Teens and Cell Phones

Is there a teen that doesn't have a cell phone?  Is there a teen that doesn't know how to text?  More parents are just learning to text, as their kids can go at the speed of lightening.

Does your teen want a new fancier phone for the holidays?  Have they earned it?

Each family is different when it comes to raising their kids and what determines if they get new gadgets or not, however what shouldn't be different is the laws laid down about safe texting.

Especially if your teenager is also a driver, they need to understand the consequences of distracted driving - whether it is putting on make-up, changing the radio station or iPod, or texting while driving - it is never acceptable.  When operating a vehicle your 100% attention is needed to be on the road.

Florida Highway Patrol offers these tips you need to share with your teen drivers:

• Make safe driving your first priority. If talking on your cell phone is going to distract you, don't use it while driving. If you are behind the wheel and you get a call, just let it ring! If the caller wants to talk to you, he will leave a message. If you suddenly need to make a call, pull over and stop your car as soon as you can.
• Keep your eyes on the road. If you absolutely must use your cell phone while driving, don't take your eyes off the road - not even for a second! If you have to dial a number, use speed dial if possible. Better yet, wait until you are stopped at a traffic light or stop sign, dial the number quickly, then place your call before pulling back into traffic. If you must answer a call while driving, make sure your phone is where you can easily find it without taking your eyes off the road. You should memorize the feel of the buttons on your phone so that you don't have to look down at it to accept or place a call.
• Be Prepared. If you are expecting calls or know that you will be placing calls while you are behind the wheel, make preparations. Don't take notes or look up numbers while driving. Again, keep your eyes on the road. Use speed dial or keep all numbers handy. If at all possible, install a hands-free device to avoid having to take your hands off the wheel.
• Limit Conversation. A cell phone is useful in emergencies and is definitely convenient. However, it can be abused. Drivers who engage in lengthy or involved conversations are just asking for trouble. It is very hard to concentrate on driving while you are trying to make vacation plans or comfort a friend in the hospital. You should not engage in stressful or emotional conversations that may distract you from your primary task - driving your car!
• Use Common Sense. Know when it is safe to talk on your cell phone. You should not talk on the cell phone during hazardous driving conditions. If road conditions are not safe, traffic is heavy, or weather is severe, don't use your cell phone -- it is simply not worth risking a crash…or your life!

Be an educated parent, you will have safer teens!

Read more.